Looking Back and Forward

Comfortable breeding In my younger old age I had some pretty malformed views about the world around me thanks to my parents, most(prenominal)ly my mother, barely as I have grown up and am now an heavy(a) those views have changed immensely and made me a better soulfulness. My name is moreoerine fir and I grew up in a fitting sized town c altogethered Fullerton, California. Let me jeopardizetrack a second. I was born in D altogetheras, Texas, but raised by my adopted parents in Southern California from come along 3 months until 18 years old. Fullerton was your standard definition of a town for deal who were of the upper middle elucidate to the lower upper class income classifications.This paper is being written with the intent to describe to you how my raising at a rattling early age, my own secretly kept views, and subsequent events in my adolescence has shaped me into who I am at present. I am from a neighborhood of folks who are well withdraw financially with dec ent sized houses and n spyglass cars. My parents, Marinate and Robert Fir, were very well off. He was a Cardiovascular Surgeon, and she Just left a high end treat Job to raise me and my younger sister Mary. Being the oldest of the two, although non by much, I got spoiled more and learned early on how to gear up what I takeed by bearing my mouth shut and staying on moms skillful side.My dad was one of the sweetest, most level headed guys one would want to know unless mom was around and then it was uniform a staring(a) transformation into someone unpleasant within minutes. My mom pretty was on the same level as the Rockefeller. Everything with her, from A-Z, had to be the very die up of the line, marking labeled stuff. I pretty much grew up with a florid spoon in my mouth. Now one would imply that this was the high keep and a dream come true but permit me state you it was non all it was cracked up to be.I found out very early on that my moms fashion of showing love was through the all time American symbol we all cherish and aspect called the Dollar. here(predicate) is a hundred dollars now get out of my face and I pass on give you $300 for every A on your business relationship card and $250 for every B as long as you keep up good grades and do not tarnish our re flummoxation, she would say. Then when I got the A I was told What, you couldnt get an A+? Dont get me wrong, I love my mom, but she was the most hateful, snobbish person that flock hated ford paths with.If their friends or mine were not Caucasian, then they were horrid throng and she would stag snide comments about them. So you can imagine how it sat with ere that my Dads severalizener, and possessor of the medical practice, was from Honk Kong and wealthier than we were. Her intolerance did not stop at backwash alone but branched out to people of different invigorationstyles or religions like the Gays or Muslims. The comments she would make like All gays should be put on an Island and blown up genuinely made me uncomfortable in general especially since she did not care who heard her or where we were.This upbringing had me in a whirlwind. I was being taught that every person who was not white,catholic, and straight was an outcast but all the while struggling in my mind to fight this knowing that at age 9 1 was only interested romantically in guys. Needless to say this was something that I could not divulge to anyone until I was out of the house. My dad was nothing like this unless my mother was within ear shot. At first glance anyone would think this was a comp allowe nightmare and all around bad bunk but I will explain later wherefore this was actually a blessing in disguise and made me who I am today.Erie Frontbencher alludes to the important people in our lives as being a part of our micro-system and I fully agree (Witt & Mossier, 2010). I bet you are inquire why I made that stretch forth comment about qualification me who I am today and a lso curious as to who among the most important people in my flavor back then was the top one. Surprise, the top one was my mom Marinate. It was through the way she treated people and looked at the world that I said to myself There is no way, low any circumstances, that I will grow up being that clubby and that judgmental. I was determined to treat others equally and as I would want to be I can help people and make a difference. My dad was an amazing man. It was through watching him that I learned how to abide her. The simple answer to that was to ignore her or occasionally nod in agreement even though I was opposed to hat she had Just said or did. He also taught me that money was not everything and that treating people differently based on the size of their pocket books was wrong. I really looked up to him and valued his input more than he probably will ever know.My neighbors truly helped me through this tough time as they were all real people just being who they were naturally , not caring light speed% what others thought or my mom. I was able to vent to them and relax my declare to them although unflurried not on the fact that I was gay. Without them in my life I probably would have exploded. So you robbery saw in my outline that I listed the man at the ice rink as being an important influence in my life. I was between the ages of night club and twelve when my mom decided I should take up ice skating. She had always waived hi to this nice guy who drove the machine to clear and clean the ice.One day I decided to wave back. She fiercely started back at me and said I do not want that aid infested fagged coming over here. This both hurt and shocked me. When she was not around I would talk with him about his life and how he was doing. He confided in me about how he was in fact gay and had AIDS. He also told me how much Marinate dated him for that and could not understand why she did the phony waves and smiles. I looked up to him for having the courage to be himself and to not let the words or actions of others influence him.I was probably 15 when I last visited my grandma, Rose, in San Francisco with a friend of mine. We were there with my dad who was visiting his commence in the hospital dying. Rose and I were discussing random things when out of the pitiful she said Love is love and rare to find. I was completely stunned and speechless at this comment. Not only had she then known he was more then a friend but was okay with t. It was at that moment that I knew once I made the decision to finally come out to my parents that I would never hide who I was meant to be. That people are people just trying to live the best life they can while on this earth.I read an article that goes along with what I have been writing about and it states that the foundation of who we are today is influenced by the people who have input of any kind in our life, I. E. Parents, caregivers, siblings, relatives, teachers, churches, sports teams, clubs, friends, employers, employees, graze mates, and so on. How we choose to interpret hose experiences is unique to us (Essence Holistic, 2012). So as I kind of alluded to in the above paragraphs, I am determined one day to be in a dress where I can help people from all walks of like and let them know someone cares and is looking out for their best interests.That is why I am choosing to go into the social science major and then progress that with a counseling degree. My goal is to hold groups and help people with hive/AIDS which is something I have since I was around 10 years old I have been dreaming of my prince charming sweeping me off my feet and growing old together while having many another(prenominal) adventures ND grammatical construction a life together. A lot of people are fatigue on this idea but I think this fairy boloney romance can and does exist. It is Just rare to find.Although I too am leery at this happening in this stage of my, I still hold onto that hope. I f eel getting a still life will further pave the way for this happening. In the end I Just want what most of us want and that is a stable place to lay our heads with a companion at our sides to share the good and bad times and Just be comfortable without too many stresses and worries. Looking back, due to my upbringing, I would never have dreamed that Id be an openly, proud gay man with friends of all ages and from all walks of life whom I value equally.It was because of those times and the struggles once I left home over the last 15 plus years that has landed me here today realizing that a people oriented career is what I desire. I am looking forward to utilizing this knowledge and becoming an even better person driven to help others open their eyes. As mentioned above, I was exposed to many distorted views about society and the world around me due to the way my mother was. This was then of course furthered by my own realization of who I was. Although our support groups whitethorn throw off active vibes and may be self centered, it does not have to be a bad thing nor predetermine our own destiny.